Ponderize

Each week I have tried to follow the advice given by Elder Durant, to find a scripture to focus on for the week, and I just wanted to reflect on the last few weeks.

t has been something especially important to me because I wrote down that I needed to "find a 'friend scripture' each week" during the opening song of the first session of Conference. You can probably imagine my surprise when Elder Durant described how he and his wife "ponderize" scriptures, if a very sinilar ways as I was thinking of "friend scriptures."

All of the scriptures were chosen because they stood out to me either during personal or family scripture study, and I t's kind of funny that several of them have just sort of led into the next one. Learning of the Prince of darkness, and our ability to overcome (John 14:30, JST) led to a desire to be corrected in weakness (Jeremiah 10:24); which led to the importance of being spiritually-minded (2 Nephi 9:39); and finally, organizing to be more able to be spiritually-minded (D&C 88:119). I've never seen the "line upon line" aspect of moving closer to my Father in Heaven than in and through this last several weeks of ponderizing scriptures, and reflecting on the way they link together. 

I truly do feel like I am moving closer to the direction and purpose He has for me, and I feel like I am blessed, but I'm also better able to bless those around me (and especially my family) as I move closer to the place and person my God wants me to be. 

Organize Yourself

I totally forgot to create my #ponderize memento on Monday, but D&C 88:119 has been on my mind all week. 

Ever since we began the process to move to Florida, we have been decluttering and dejunking our belongings. Sure there are things that we maybe would have liked to keep, and I feel like a box I thought we kept is missing, but we have been cleaning out our belongings. 

Then, when we got here, oh my! It was chaos! Boxes everywhere! It was overwhelming to even unpack one box for a while, but as we've started to get the house clean and orderly, there has been such a sense of peace in our home. As we have been able to organize our temporal goods, it seems like our spiritual life has fallen into place. 

There is a tangible difference in the feeling of our home when we are able to keep the house organized. I feel like it's easier to do the other this listed--like pray, fast, be faithful, and just have our minds focused and centered on our Heavenly Father and Savior--when we have a clean and orderly house. 

Remember to be spiritually minded

"O, my beloved brethren, remember the awfulness in transgressing against that Holy God, and also the awfulness of yielding to the enticings of that cunning one.

***Remember, to be carnally-minded is death, and to be spiritually-minded is life eternal.***"

-2 Nephi 2:39

I have always liked the emphasized portion of this verse, and have remembered "spiritually-minded is life eternal" by the acronym "SMILE" (I feel like most young women have received a handout with that from an instructor at some point in their lives...) but this time the whole verse stood out to me. 

This verse reminded me of our Savior's suffering on Gethsemene. "Remember the awfulness of transgressing against that Holy God." How awful I feel when I accidentally make mistakes, but how much worse I feel after I realize I willfully chose to do something to add to that pain and suffering. How awful!

It just reminds me of an experience today: I lost my temper at my 2yo. I overreacted to her being perfectly 2, and by so doing, my Savior not only suffered to Atone for my mistake and anger, but He also suffered through the pain and heartache felt by my daughter. By losing my temper (and in some small way, "yielding to the enticings of the cunning one") my Savior was pained twice in the same instant. 

To me, being spiritually-minded means always remembering that gift of life, given of death, suffering and love. If I had been more spiritually-minded, I would have been more patient, slower to anger and react to my daughter; and I would have avoided hurting 2 people. 

While we seem to have made amends, it gave me a a glimpse of the awfulness of yielding to the enticings of the cunning one. 

Correct Me

"O Lord, correct me, but with judgment; not in thine anger, lest thou bring me to nothing." -Jeremiah 10:24

This week, Mario really felt like it was important to remember that we will need correction in this life, from a loving God, not in His judgement, for we are so imperfect that we could be completely destroyed if He wanted to. 

What I took from this message is that we have such a loving Father in Heaven, that even though He could bring us to nothing, and, because we are imperfect and need frequent corrections, there are times that He would be perfectly justified in exacting that judgement; instead, He loves us so much that we are corrected, instead of destroyed.

                   

Trying New Things and Hidden Talents

I don't know what it is about lately, I have been feeling like something was missing from my life. I have a wonderful husband, who has shown me more love, care and compassion than I thought imaginable; I have two wonderful daughters, who keep my life busy; and I have my love of the Gospel and my Savior.... Yet, something was missing. Then one day, a friend asked Mario if he would develop a website for her, trading goods/services. And all the sudden things changed.

Mario wasn't able to do much work on the website, due to teaching, so he suggested I give it a whorl. Low and behold, I was actually pretty good at it, and things just sort of picked up. Now, we're nearly ready to launch, and I think I might have found something I could continue doing as a supplemental income, and we're in the process of registering an online, home-based web development company with the State of Florida! It's a little overwhelming and exciting at the same time! I don't really have anything to show for web development, yet, but I look forward to the time in the near future when both are finalized!

If that weren't surprising enough, Mario and I also decided I should start cutting his hair. Since we both have short haircuts that need more maintenance, the cost of haircuts were adding up. Mario suggested that we buy a set of hair clippers because that cost about the same as one hair cut for him, and we went Cold Turkey to have me cut his hair. Oh my goodness!! You should have seen me hesitating to make the first cut. I knew that once I made that cut, there was no going back, and I was literally shaking with trepidation! That, combined with the vibration of the hair clippers, made it so I didn't do anything except turn the clippers on and off for about 5 minutes. (Mario was laughing at me, and in retrospect, I'm sure I seemed ridiculous!) After I was finally able to calm down enough to move smoothly, I made the first cut, and committed myself to finishing.

I am by no means an expert, and I don't think I would ever feel comfortable certifying to be a hairdresser, but it wasn't that bad! While I don't have a good "Before" picture, I was impressed enough that I wanted to share the final product. (I must have still been a little shaky, because my photos just didn't turn out well, so sorry for the blurriness.)

             

After: Back

After: Front (plus 2 cuties)

I don't want to boast, but I just wanted to share that sometimes we have talents and skills we don't know about. I've always had a hard time with a couple of the talent parables, including hiding your light under a bushel, because I have such a hard time seeing what talents I have to share. I don't want to have anything taken away for lack of use, but I often feel like a "Jack of all trades, master of none" with nothing to share. But maybe it's because I missed part of the parables include increasing in talents. Sure, it's clear that we are to develop the talents we already have, but maybe Jesus was trying to teach us that increasing in talents is as much about trying new things to increase in the NUMBER of talents/skills we have, as it is about improving current talents/skills. We are taught that all will have their place in Zion. (If we're still alive during the Second Coming and Millennium, Mario will clearly be doing something with computers.) While I'm still not sure where my "place" will be, I am glad for the reminder to keep trying new things, and, who knows, maybe my purpose is still to be discovered.

Just let this be the moral of the story: just because something is new and scary, doesn't mean it's not worth trying. Perhaps it's one of your hidden talents. You never know until you try.

The Prince of Darkness

"Hereafter I will not talk much with you: for the prince of darkness, who is of this world, cometh, but hath no power over me, but he hath power over you." 

-John 14:30 (JST).

How fitting it is that the Lord would remind us, through His Disciples, that He could not be touched by the "prince of darkness," or the adversary, but that we could. As we each are imperfect, we allow Satan into our lives. Each wrong choice allows him a little more access to our spirit, until we could, ultimately, be completely under his control. Conversely, every time we are able to exercise self-control, to resist his temptations, we are more able to resist in the future. 

I believe that is how Jesus Christ was able to get to the point where He could not be touched by Satan. Day by day, He chose correct principles; He fasted, prayed and studied as a boy; He always chose to be perfectly obedient, until that day, near His death, He had built such a firm knowledge of and shield from His Father, that He left no gaps for Satan to sneak in. 

So too can we get to that point, day-by-day, making correct choices, repenting from our mistakes and shortcomings through our Lord and Savior, until someday, we too can be completely unaffected by the temptations and fiery darts of the adversary. 

Can you imagine why it sometimes seems harder when we think we're doing the right thing? If we get stronger each time we withstand Satan, can you imagine how much more he would want to fight for us to be miserable like unto him? 

I'm not really sure who I'm talking to (quite possibly just my future self), but please remember, that when things seem to get harder, it might just be because we're on the right path, and the devil doesn't want to lose what ground he has gained in controlling us. 

Keep moving forwards. Strive to become the best you can be, and constantly rely on the Savior. There is no way we can make it alone, but He has provided a way that we can completely escape the bands of the adversary, and our Savior, Jesus Christ, WANTS us to let Him help us escape. 

Again, to whomever this message is intended for, know that I love you, your Savior loves you, and your hardships may just be proof that you are headed in the right direction. 

"Peace I Give Unto You"

"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you..." -John 14:27

Today I had a hard time focusing on General Conference since our toddler decided she needed more active attention, but we were able to get her to sit down and watch most of President Monson's talk. I regret that I didn't catch much of his message, as I had a hard time not trying to reach out to him and help him stand through the tv. 

While I'm sure he had the support from the other side of the veil, it got me thinking. In the past 3-6 months, we have seen the passing of 3 sweet, loving and religious men, and I would not be surprised if President Monson joins them, and his dear wife, soon. 

I don't want to come across as casual or taking light of his divine calling. I am grateful for his service. I know he has been called of God to lead the church during this time, and he will continue to fulfill this calling and responsibility until his mortal frame fails him. But I also know that he cannot live forever. 

It is sometimes hard to think of those we love, who we know have loved us in return, passing through this journey of life, onto the next journey. With this realization, that we may only have a limited time left to enjoy the presence of President  Monson on this earth, I realized that I was never sad about the passings of Preisdent Packer and Elders Perry and Scott because of the peace of the Spirit, the knowledge that they moved on to continue living on the other side of the veil. I will miss them, and the sweet spirit they always brought to their talks and efforts, I am excited they are no longer limited by their frail, mortal frames. I truly have felt that peace promised by the Lord in John 14:27, and I wanted to share that peace with others. 

I love our Prophet, and the 14 other men who serve with him as prophets, seers and revelators. I'm excited for the future messages from Elders Rasband, Stevenson and Renlund, and I enjoyed what I caught from their messages today. And, when the time comes, I am ready to love and sustain President Nelson (or whomever the Lord will call, President Nelson being the current successor) as the Prophet. Until then, I will continue to love, support, sustain and pray for President Thomas S. Monson.